The courage to tell your story

Have you ever noticed that the people who behave the worst, are the ones who fancy themselves the hero/ine in the story?

I’ve been going through my notes from a recent Writing Course that I taught. It was a deep emotional kind of writing in the genre Memoir. What really interested me, was that when asked why they chose not to publish or share their writing, that a range of people all said the same thing : FEAR. (I remember saying that too when I first started publishing).

I took the time to really look at the profiles of the characters that they had written about that they most feared would react negatively. It wasn’t the public. It wasn’t Twitter trolls. It wasn’t some overly critical readers out there in Cyberspace. No, the characters in their TRUE stories who my writers feared most were those closest to them! It was parents, siblings, loved ones.

As a result, the writers I am talking about became immobilised.

They were terrified of being called gaslighters, drama kings and queens, liars or being told that they were bringing up old secrets that were best left under the dirty carpet.

Sound familiar? I thought you would say yes.

The issue is universal and it does not only relate to writing. It’s a people issue.

As a writing coach though, my job is really only to facilitate a process, to guide and mentor, to edit and teach technical aspects. I would never push anyone to write or share that which they are not ready to do BUT I will (and did) say this:

• It is YOUR story
• You decide how you write the characters
• The ones that have a problem with their characteristics, should have behaved better
• How your truth lands is something out of your control
• But tell your story, YOU MUST

Perhaps my little pep talk has gotten you thinking? Do you have a story you want to write or share? I offer a range of writing and coaching services, which you can see on my website www.leemayimele.com

Remember, this is YOUR story and we all have a story that only we can tell. Truth is magic!

xoxo

Lee

Wanna join me for a cold shower?

I’ve been taking cold showers for about 15 years now.

I can’t remember where exactly I first read about the benefits, but I do remember thinking that I would absolutely die the first time I tried it.

Photo by Vecislavas Popa on Pexels.com

I’ve never used a guide or any scientific methodology for my shower routine but I trusted the way it made me FEEL and I went a little longer than 10 seconds every day.

Then, for a few weeks now, I’ve been wanting to learn something new to add to my meditation practice.  I honestly felt drawn to include something physical.  Yoga?  Some martial arts?  That’s how I came across The Wim Hof Method.  It turns out Wim is the boss of all things cold water and exactly the answer to my prayer.

“When you go into cold water, you learn to breathe deeply—automatically and naturally. Your blood vessels constrict, giving your vascular system a complete workout. This is the flow of life force itself, and you can learn to regulate it. ” ~ Wim Hof

Aha!  I signed up for a course with him right away.  Over the next couple of weeks, I know I’m going to want to cry as I’m asked to go colder and deeper.  I mean, this is the dude who climbed Kilimanjaro in shorts & swims under icebergs!

That said, I’m excited to learn about: 

• the potential of the breath to alkalise the blood
• how to boost our oxygen intake
• using cold water to release chemicals in the brain to benefit the body

So, now that you’ve got the lowdown, are you keen to join me for that cold shower sometime?  If not, are you going to listen to that little voice of your own, giving you direction about your own journey of self-care, self-mastery and learning?

I think you will…

Lee 

For more info about The Wim Hof Method

http://www.wimhofmethod.com

Dear Kids (A reflection from a greying Mama’s Heart)

Dear Kids

Whilst no parent has all the answers and whilst this mama is constantly, still learning, know this for sure:

1. You are never alone
2. Travel is the best teacher
3. “No” is a good word. Use it often. It’s particularly lovely when there’s a dead silence and you offer no explanations
4. “Please” and “thank you” never goes out of fashion
5. Water heals. Oceans. Tears. 2 litres a day
6. You have a built-built in “people” radar. Please listen to its beep beep beep when something feels offish
7. Sleep is medicine
8. Play, play, play. Never stop playing
9. Less sugar, less screen time, more grass, more laughs
10. God is inside you and no one one has a special hotline that you need to go through
11. Betrayal is painful. Nothing can prepare you for that kick in the groin
12. Go out and explore. You can always come home to cry
13. Try and remember who you were before the world started pinning its labels on you
14. Your body is beautiful. Exactly as is. Explore it. Admire it. Treat it right and it will reward you so much
15. No one knows it all
16. Blood makes you related. Loyalty makes you family
17. Believe in magic. Those who don’t, never find it
18. Your word is your honour. Do what you say you will. Always
19. A grateful heart is a magnet for miracles
20. Give freely. Of what you have. Of your time. And quietly please
21. No one likes a show-off
22. Learn to listen. To God’s voice in the early morning. To yourself. Certainly to people who you trust
23. Shortcuts never work
24. People will forget what you say but they will never forget how you made them FEEL. Be kind
25. Books, music, thunderstorms and tea are good for lonesome days when you need your mama
26. Abundance and prosperity are your birth right
27. Look beyond the labels of race and religion, gender and social standing. How people treat people from whom they need nothing is where you should focus your scoring and grading
28. Jealousy is when you count other people’s blessings instead of your own
29. Love does not need to hurt
30. Speak your truth. Even when your voice shakes
31. What sets your soul on fire? Go there
32. Learning is constant
33. Messing up is okay. Intentionally hurting someone never is
34. You teach people how to treat you
35. You may have one “true love” or many or even none. Remember that you are whole anyway
36. You have a story that only YOU can tell

 

xoxo

Mama

 

© Aluta continua, as they say.  A Heart Full of Stories, 2017

Shine your WEIRDO LIGHT bright (A short Soul-Sunday reflection on being YOU)

My HEART had a massage this week.

 

Someone described me by saying “She gets PEOPLE fatigue” (describing my way of engaging fully socially and then clandestinely retreating back to my own space and pace).

 

Game changer. Bloody damn GAME CHANGER!

 

It’s one thing to know something about ourselves. It’s another to know that someone else GETS it!

 

I mean, isn’t that what we all want? A gentle voice mirroring back to us those beautiful words “it’s okay”.

 

Okay to be weird

Okay to different

Okay to go at a pace that isn’t exactly textbook, but a pace that feels right just for us?

 

I must tell you, it’s just lovely.

Just so lovely when one heart bows to another in a simple Namaste-style salute that says “You’re weird. But, gosh, so are all of us!”

 

 

© Aluta continua, as they say.  A Heart Full of Stories, 2017

Your perception is your reality (Sisters)

They were practically twins, conceived in quick succession. They celebrated their birthdays 11 months apart.

Their experiences of the same home varied dramatically.

The younger sister was resilient, self assured and held beautiful memories of growing up.  The older sister was sensitive, introverted and thought her upbringing had been less than satisfactory.

Their choices of partners, lovers, friends and interests reflected these dramatically different internal dialogues.

The question came out of the blue, like a gust of wind.  “Why do you have this insatiable need for the approval of strangers?”

The accused answered “You will never understand”.

She was right.

Sisters always are.

© A Heart Full of Stories, 2015. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Lee-Ann Mayimele and www.aheartfullofstories.wordpress.com with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

YOU are Enough

…The time surely comes

When you put yourself first

When you regain your God essence

When you count your blessings

When you honour your sadness

When you give yourself permission to try

When you name your pain

When you stop calling your passion a “hobby”

When you keep your word

When you kick someone out of your emotional bed

When you alienate nasty creatures

When you write thank you notes

When you take more risks

When you stop trusting losers

When you approach people you need

When you say no to darkness

When you yield appropriately

When you say beautiful words of gratitude instinctively

When you sleep for days

When you trust your internal red flags

When you disappoint another heart

When you run your race and let others run theirs

When you clear everything on your vision board and start again

When you no longer mind being called emotional

When you equate self respect with breathing

When you allow yourself to dream again

When you listen to a child

When you let yourself be touched

When you honour your calling

When you travel to places that call you

When you risk humiliation

When you press “reset” on your life

When you accept the shape of the parts you disguise

When you simply say “not today”

When you acknowledge those that guide you

When you start imitating yourself

When you draw a line in the sand

When you empower other people

When you forgive yourself

When you delight in the success of others

When you laugh loud

When you kiss your broken heart

When you are your own role model

When you emulate the speckles of light you see

When you tone down the noise

When you soothe your heart with music

When you dine alone

When you share your struggles

When you own your fears

When you unlearn your defences

…and on that day, may you know that YOU are enough YOU have always been enough YOU will always be enough End of story!

Aluta Continua, I say!  The road is long (for me)

© A Heart Full of Stories, 2015. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Lee-Ann Mayimele and www.aheartfullofstories.wordpress.com with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.